For the most part, I’m a pretty budget conscious guy. Anyone familiar with the concept of diminishing returns, aka the idea that as you spend more and more money on a product the return on investment proposition becomes worse and worse especially toward the high end, likely knows to stay away from most “top of the line” products. While offering best in class performance, it’s often feasible to attain 90% of their functionality with much cheaper things. Well, thanks to seeing some buzz about a bussin’ Ciri doll, I thought it would be fun to throw budget concerns out of the window and explore the world of high end sex dolls. At least I hope $3000 is fucking considered high end but somehow I doubt it.
What you see pictured is a 5’6 tall, 86 lbs, D-cup boob, $2,799 sex doll from the very aptly named sexdolls-shop.com. This particular model is Ciri from The Witcher series. I will be completely honest, no this isn’t sponsored in any way, when I first saw these photos I thought I was looking at a 3D model. This shit looks so real to me that I still have trouble wrapping my head around the fact that this is a real product. And believe me I did some googling to see if it was a scam or not and according to other sources it’s the real deal, though there are many scammers out there that try to rip off this style of sex doll without using sturdy materials and such. Assuming the doll looks half as good as it does in the pictures by the time it arrives at your homestead, I can see where the thousands of dollars have gone.
Like damn... what?
For the sake of hypothetical let’s say I’m not being deceived, it will in fact arrive looking that pristine and detailed. Would I be down to drop $2799 on this bad girl? No. Don’t get me wrong, I think Ciri is hot as hell even though I haven’t played the game. The shop also has Aerith, Tifa, and Morgana dolls but no matter how hot the lady, I don’t think I’m prepared to drop two racks plus. Even if I did have the money on hand and ready to throw away on a sex doll, this is the kind of product that seems too inconvenient to enjoy. I mean where the fuck do you store this thing when you’re not using it? I guess in a closet or under the bed but damn my closets got enough weird shit in there without a 5’6 doll hanging around. Say it was actually time to fuck. Now I have to lug this 86 lb giant out of my closet, prop it on the bed, fuck it, clean it, and then lug it back to where I store it? Hell nah, I can barely be bothered to clean up after using an onahole, the last thing a guy wants to do after cumming is get straight to being productive, at least in my experience. Overall I think there are much cheaper and much more hassle-free ways of spicing up your single sex life than one of these so I don’t think I’d ever want to own one.
But like, if I lived in a mansion or something with endless storage space, perhaps I could be tempted.
Nice try guys, but until you make an Aigis Doll 3000 from Persona 3 that automatically sucks my dick after I get done with work everyday, my funds are going to stay locked away safe and sound. Hopefully I’ll just find a real girlfriend long before technology advances that far, otherwise I may be doomed. Did you think the doll was worth almost three grand? Would you like to own a sex doll that big and lifelike for realism, or would it be too much hassle? If the doll was of a certain character would that change your mind? Buy some Barbies, set up your dollhouse, and play pretend in the comments below!
