Ah, the Olympics. A tournament in the spirit of competition, honor, and fairness. Gaming is not so different in this regard. It matters not who picks up the controller, only that they can score a team kill, hit a sick headshot, and use curse words and harsh insults effectively. Master this, and by god you may be ready to play an esport. But say you want to make a career for yourself. Well my aspiring athlete, the Olympics has you covered. Prepare yourself to go for the gold this summer in… Tic Tac Bow? I suppose something that managed to achieve a whopping rating of 1.9 out of 5 on the Google Play Store is definitely worthy of being included. Hmm, that must be a new esport on the market. How about Tennis Clash? Uh, what the fuck is Just Dance doing here? Zwift Cycling, is that even considered a game? What the hell are these picks?

Much to the dismay of anyone who has played a competitive video game ever, the Olympics has royally fucked up their lineup of “esports titles” to the point where most players would not even consider these real games. Tennis Clash is a mobile game where you play tennis by swiping your finger, and Tic Tac Bow is… also a mobile game. When you think of sweaty gaming your mind likely goes to titles like Valorant, Overwatch, Street Fighter, League of Legends, DOTA, Rocket League, and similarly established esports. That’s what I expected upon reading the announcement and judging from the feedback, it seems that’s what pretty much everyone else expected to see too. Unfortunately that is not the case as it appears the committee opted for a different route. Supposedly the committee wanted to pick games similar to already established Olympic sports, hence the shit like Tic Tac Bow resembling archery and Zwift stepping in for cycling. My problem is, there are so many games that would make better choices than these mobile game offerings. Hell I’d wager Wii Sports Tennis takes more fucking skill than Tennis Clash.  My prediction is these lackluster picks will leave gamers uninterested and regular viewers confused at their inclusion in the first place.

Uh... I'll stick to watching FGC tournaments, thanks.

Anyway, Olympic viewership has been declining in recent years and I suppose the organizers are trying to incorporate new aspects to refresh the audience’s interest. While I don’t expect anyone who cares about gaming whatsoever to tune in to see the grand finals of the Tic Tac Bow tournament, this could be the first step in witnessing esports claw their way into one of the most internationally recognized tournament series on the planet, if not the biggest. Have you watched the Olympics in the past? Did you know they plan to include “esports” this year? Will you tune in to see how any of the games play out? Train your wrists off, eat like a champion with the help of a professional dietitian, and warm up those fingers to swipe your phone screen with the best of them in the comments below!