When Steve was announced in Smash, it was a big reminder that holy shit anything is possible for that game. I’m finally ready for my Dora The Explorer crossover. You know Boots would make a good assist partner in that shit. Anyway, Nintendo has already made some changes to Steve in a recent patch for the game. Some were listed, but in my opinion the most interesting change was not. As you can see in the following comparison picture, the developers took out his meat from his win screen.
Little Mac was clearly not happy about the change.
As you can probably guess from this article being on a doujin site, people found the meat to resemble Steve holding a huge dick in his hands. Most of the reactions I’ve seen from this change have been negative with people stating that if you know anything about Minecraft you can guess that’s not a penis, and that it was unnecessary censorship to appease a small minority of Internet trolls. Normally that sounds like a stance my ass would take, but I do have a bit more leeway when a company builds their reputation around being family friendly. Nintendo in general is known for this, and on top of that Minecraft is still a game played by a ton of kids. To the opposing side’s credit though, I feel like they could have simply placed it in his other hand or adjusted the shape a bit to preserve it while killing any chance of it being perceived as a penis by any sensible human.
Regardless what’s done is done, but man did this bring up horrible repressed memories of the fact that Minecraft porn exists. I’m usually an open-minded kind of individual in the sex department, but damn man that is one form of lewd content that I was never able to understand or get behind. When I was coming through you couldn’t escape seeing a little Minecraft porn here and there. The fact that it’s just block people trying their best to fuck always came across as more awkward and pathetic than hot for me. The closest I could get to enjoying it were clean ass animations that actually gave the girls boobs and… you know… emotions, eyes, everything else. The blocky body structure was kept though so it was still a no go for my dick. While I did appreciate these animations much more than other forms of Minecraft porn, I can proudly say I’ve never climaxed to Minecraft porn ever, to this day. And considering the stuff I have climaxed to, that’s a fine achievement.
Close, but no cigar.
Was Nintendo right to play it safe and remove the meat? Was it an unnecessary change pandering to trolls? Do you ever watch Minecraft porn? Build your fort before night falls in the comments below!
