The Oppai Mouse pad. A construct that is as old as the anime community itself. Well, probably not but damn it sure feels like it. I remember seeing these things years and years ago. At first I expected them to last for a year or so. Maybe some people would buy them, but who wants to have a mousepad with anime boobs plastered over it? Even if you live alone, what if you need to invite a friend over? I suppose considering the average anime fan that’s probably a moot point (don’t worry I’m including myself) but still. 

Don’t get me wrong, I understand the need for a cushioned mouse pad. Mine has an excess amount at the bottom to make sure my wrist has a nice place to rest while doing shit on the computer. If you’ve never tried a cushioned mouse pad, I highly recommend it. It feels quite nice and I know you people spend way too much time on the computer anyway. Yes you do, don’t fucking lie to me. Therefore, it’d be a worthwhile investment. But it seems like making it into an oppai mouse pad only brings disadvantages.

Okay, I'll admit some of them are appealing...

First of all, how the fuck am I supposed to focus with this shit always looking at me. Are you supposed to be eternally horny? Look at that fucking Android 18 one. You’re telling me you can study, draft a document, sort through email, or do anything without wanting to fuck with that girl staring you down? Next, you’re taking on extra risk for no reward. Owning an onahole sucks, you gotta hide that shit from anyone you live with or want to have as a guest like any other sex toy. However, at least it provides the satisfaction of a different sexual experience. What satisfaction does a lewd mouse pad provide? “Ah yes, my hand is now resting upon 18’s printed breasts. This is epic.” I’ll admit the art can be hot as fuck sometimes and fun to look at, but that’s what I have doujins for. 

I’m waiting for someone in the comments to say “No you retard, the mouse part is just an excuse, you put lube on it and then roll it up and fuck it” or something and reveal some unknown usefulness. As it is, these seem like one of those anime products, like body pillows, that are incredibly tacky and untasteful and make the anime community look cringy as hell.

Mousepad? That's a mousemat.

Have you ever owned an oppai mousepad? In fact, have you ever met anyone who owns one of these in real life? Is there something cool about it I’m missing? Use your mouse to scroll down to the comment section and leave one below!